Detroit Half Marathon... My first 13.1!!

So last week was finally the big week for my first half marathon. It was kind of crazy! The entire week, I closely read over the race guidelines, where to pick my packet up, what I would need to bring, where I would need to go, when the roads would start to shut down, where the water and pit stops were, what the course looked like ect. Since this was an international race that involved crossing from Michigan to Canada, and back my biggest concern was getting stopped at the border. The materials for the race cautioned runners on carrying liquids across the border. I have a hydration belt that I bought at the beginning of my training that fit my passport, and GU packs that I was planning on bringing, and did ultimately. As the days leading up to the marathon got closer, my nerves set in. I had been sick for about 6 weeks leading up to the race, and my training was cut short. The longest I run I had gotten up to was 9 miles prior to race day. I had done a few 6-mile runs in the couple of weeks leading up to it. Along with circuit classes a few times a week. I had read that strength training is good for endurance and injury prevention, and I have to believe it is true with how the race actually went! So two days prior to race day I ventured to downtown Detroit, to pick up my race packet. I went alone, which was fine. I enjoying doing things on my own. It also allows me to wander, take my time, and talk to random people. (I know I should use caution with this, and I do, don’t worry!!) So I get to the Health Expo to collect my packet. I wander around looking at all the gear, and food, and promoters for upcoming races. I stumbled upon one booth for 3:16 athletic wear. Which I have seen online before. They sell dri-tech clothing with bible scriptures on them. On any normal day, I would have never bought anything from them, (because I am WAY to cheap), but something caught my eye. There was a shirt that had the verse 40:31 on it. Which if you are not familiar with it, says, “but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.” Which was one of the verses my mom would say over and over while my dad was sick before he passed. It may have been in his memorial card thing (whatever they are officially called), as well. I talked to the man in the booth for a few minutes, and told him my story, and why this verse had meant so much. He told me a few stories as well, and that he was 5-time iron man competitor, and that his family had volunteered for the relief stations at some iron man events. The one thing he said, that keeps playing in my mind is that during these events participants become so physically and mentally exhausted that sometimes all that’s left is God. I would soon have a little taste of what that was like. So fast-forward 2 days. Sunday (way too earlier in the morning), my husband is driving us downtown to race. (I raced alone, but he was an amazing supporter). I am being my spastic self, messing with the radio, listening to Gospel chorus, and ghetto rap music in bumper-to-bumper traffic. My husband is calm as a calm, and I am trying not to pay attention to the traffic. But in all of the cars around us are people in their running gear, and cars displaying stickers of running distance and achievement. I point and yell, RUNNERS! Yay! My husband shakes his head. So we finally get through the traffic, and park. It is still pitch black, and freezing! We walk to the corrals, and ALLL the way to the end where I was starting. I was one of the last waves because of my slow pace time. So they announce that we need to line up, and I give my hubby my outer sweats, and one last hug before I line up. He looks at me and says, “Don’t cry.” I look back and say, “I’m not gonna cry, this is a run, I wont get emotional.” So as I line up and wait the 20 minutes to run, I am looking all around me, taking everything in. There are so many people, so many conversations, and lots of tall buildings. As I got closer to the starting line and could finally see the countdown for our wave to go, I got a little teary eyed… No tears though! So the first few miles were pretty cool. There were lots of people holding signs, and cheering on their friends and family. As I approached the Ambassador Bridge there were lots of border patrol, and cars waiting to cross the boarder. A lot of them honked and waved, and cheered as the runners passed. Mile 3 on the bridge! This mile was far less scary than I had anticipated. On a normal basis, I hate crossing bridges in the car. But this was surprisingly okay. The water looked beautiful as the sun was coming up. I didn’t get too close to the sides, and crossed with ease. While in Canada there were bands, and radio stations playing music. There was also another amazing view of the water, and the Detroit skyline. As I kept running, I thought I am really doing this, this is amazing.. So as I approached mile 7, the underwater mile back to Michigan a woman began running along side of me. She said, “This is so awesome, I haven’t stopped running this whole time. I think Im going to slow my pace in the tunnel.” I turned to her and asked, what heat were you in. It was a heat that released a few waves ahead of me. At that point I knew I was doing well, and was going to finish under my goal time of 3 hours. I had started after this woman, and had taken a 10-15 minute potty break because the lines were so long, and walked a little, and we were in the same place. So now I am in the tunnel, it is hot, and gross, and honestly creepier than being above the water. I literally just prayed throughout this whole stretch, and ran as fast as my legs would take me. I could not have gotten out of their fast enough. While I was running I noticed the back of someone else’s shirt. It told the story of how she had lost weight, and trained and was here. I congratulated her on her accomplishment as I passed. I thought, we all have a story, and run for a reason. Once I got to the other side, I could breathe, and I was over half way done!! In the next few miles, there seemed to be an eerie silence. Crowds of runners were getting tired, and all the shouts of excitement, and family members with signs had grown strangely dim. As we hit mile 10, I shouted to the half marathoners, we only have a 5k left, let’s finish strong… This energy quickly diminished as I pushed on. Just after mile 11 I could hear a group of men talking to each other. One of them was hitting their wall, and wanting to give up. His friends encouraged him that they were almost done, and he couldn’t quit now. As I passed them, one of them read the verse on the back of my shirt. And repeated, “we will run and not grow weary.” I turned around and cheered them on, and said God give us strength! I prayed a lot during this race, and asked for strength to push on. I gave thanks for the ability to be able to run, and the blessings of all of my family and friends that had supported me throughout it all. At mile 12, I started to realize that I should have ingested another gel pack, but knew I was so close to the end that there would be real food, and didn’t want to take one. I pushed on. I could see the final divider that split the full marathoners from the half marathoners, to the 13-mile finish. Once I turned the last corner, I could see the finish line, and all of the balloons. I told myself, just keep running, but my legs were so tired. For a brief second, I slowed to a walk, and someone in crowd shouted, “You’re gonna walk now, the finish is right there. Keep running!” So I gathered what energy was left and sprinted toward the finish. I finally made it! 13.1 freaking miles! As I finished, we were handed tin foil looking cover-ups, along with food! I heard my husband call my name. I walked to him and gave him a hug over the barricade. It was such an amazing moment! All the doubt, and worry, and nervousness were gone. I was tired, hungry and cold! The only thing left was the strength God had given me and the love of my husband. It was an amazing feeling. It was something I would do everyday if I could! It was such an awesome experience, and I can not wait to do it again!! So this is the story of my first long run. With lots more to come! I have already signed up for another one in a couple of weeks. The joy and excitement that this run gave me, is hard to explain, or put into words. But it is definitely something I can not wait to experience again!

What Lies Ahead

It has been a couple of months since I have posted an update, so that is where I will start. I am not sure if I mentioned it in a previous post of not, but I am back in college part time. Right now I am just taking Anatomy and Physiology, and that is enough. There is a lot to learn, and I am grateful that I can focus my schooling efforts on just this class right now. I am still working as a Social Worker with Older Adults full time, and am taking this class 2 evenings a week. Work has been stressful. I have had a couple of situations over the past month that have been so unbelievingly challenging! I really have gotten to the point with them that I had to give it to God, and pray for the situations to resolve, and for God’s will to be done because I was at a loss. With one situation after praying that, I got good news, and honestly swear I heard angels singing! It was the biggest relief, and eye opener for sure! Along with work and school, my two goals for this year were to become more connected, and be in God’s word, and to RUN. With that being said Ill start with the bad news first. My running has been non-existent in the recent weeks. I have been so unbelievably sick, and unable to breathe going for a run has been out of the question. I have been slightly discouraged, and overwhelmed by the fact that my half marathon is now two weeks away!! My last “long run” was the first weekend in September, and was 9 miles. This week I have pushed a couple of short runs. My last run a couple of days ago was only 3 miles, and my knees were starting to hurt. So  I picked back up some strength training, and am working on my squats and lunges hoping for the best! So with all of that being said, I was getting kind of down on myself, and feeling like I should probably give up. Which brings me to the second goal I had for myself this year. Getting connected, and reading God’s word. I recently joined a cell group (bible studyish), through church and have committed to reading and attending weekly. In reading the study, I am also getting more into the Bible, and praying. I honestly feel so much better. One verse that stood out to me this week was

Philippians 3:12-14 I don’t mean to say that I have already achieved these things or that I have already reached perfection. But I press on to possess that perfection for which Christ Jesus first possessed me...Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead, I press on to reach the end of the race and receive the heavenly prize for which God, through Christ Jesus, is calling us. ... I feel like this is a reoccurring theme today.. Looking forward to what is ahead and leaving my discouragement behind.

I also heard a message on Joyce Meyer’s podcast this week, talking about leaving the past behind you and looking forward to what’s ahead. So that message was very clear this week. Another message that was clear this week is that we are not perfect, that we can not do everything all the time, and we can not let stupid things steal our joy. I am so guilty of letting little things steal my joy!!! Bumps in the road, dishes in the sink, not having enough time to do everything, and still have a life! Its often discouraging. I am learning to check my thoughts and feelings though, and remain positive, and not let this crap still my joy! I deserve to be happy period (I have not believed I should be for a while). The first baby step in that for me, is to not let things or people steal my joy. Secondly, I am coming to terms with the fact that I can not do everything all the time! I am tired darnnit, and need to sleep. I also need to take care of my house, pay the bills, work, and eat (which I have not been doing a very good job of). Being an adult is overwhelming sometimes! But I have vowed to take it one step at a time, plan ahead to the best of my ability, and not beat myself up for leaving things unfinished. I am the type of person that has constant lists going of things to do, finish ect. Sometimes it is just not possible to get everything done in a day, and that is OKAY! It is, and I have to let whatever doesn’t get done, or go as planned go, and move on.

Something that was brought to my attention today is how I have sometimes compared myself to other people. Sometimes other people look like they have it all, a nice house, nice car, amazing job, and family. They may take wonderful vacations that I could never afford to go on, and for a split second I may have the thought, I wish I had their life. But do I? Nah, I am pretty happy with my own life at the moment. I am sure some people have looked at me and thought that. Especially on days like today, where I am so happy, and on fire! I can tell you this is not me, not in my own strength! I have been praying a lot that God show me where he wants me, and that his will be done in my life. I honestly feel like it is, and I can not wait to see what is to come. I can also say, that this was not always the case. I have been down dark paths, made bad choices, hung around the wrong crowd of people, let people treatment like garbage and hit rock bottom on more than one occasion. There was a point in my life that I had made so many wrong turns, and felt like so many people were against me, and that I had no friends, I did not want to live anymore. I attempted to take my own life, but did not succeed. (Praise God!) I was reminded of this during a concert I went to tonight. I saw Third Day and it was the most amazing concert I have seen in a long time! But they told a story of how they came to write their song I Need a Miracle. Apprently a fan came up to them at a show, to tell them about how their son had driven out into the woods to take his own life. In the moments before doing so, he turned on the radio, and

could not get any radio stations to come in, except for a Christian one. Which happen to be playing their song Cry out to Jesus, which lyrics say “There is hope for the helpless

Rest for the weary

Love for the broken heart

There is grace and forgiveness

Mercy and healing

He'll meet you wherever you are

Cry out to Jesus, Cry out to Jesus”

Which is just an amazing story, and these lyrics ring true! Jesus is comfort, love and hope. He saved my life over and over, and is always there when I need him the most. He died for me so that I can live. And at this point I am ready to lay down my life and walk with him. So at the end of the day I am encouraged! I know I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength! That’s about the only way I can do things! And that he has brought me this far, he isn’t going to leave me know. So I hope this was encouraging, and has given you hope!! Cry out to Jesus!!

Life Is A Balancing Act

I have been wanting to write a new post, but have been so busy the past few weeks. Where do I begin? Work has been pretty awesome lately! I have gotten a few opportunities to attend some trainings, and obtain certifications in areas that I am currently working in. I am already using some of the information and techniques I have learned. I really can't wait to continue using this information, and to begin doing caregiver trainings! Being away from home, and having to prepare food, and workouts in advance definitely took a little time. I prepped and packed all my meals  and brought them with me while I was out of town. It was kind of a pain to make breakfast, lunch and dinner, but I was pretty happy to have the food I was used to while I was gone. The crappy part was that breakfast and lunch were provided at the trainings, but because of my lovely gluten allergy, I couldn't really eat them. :( But it was okay, I came prepared, I ate healthy, didn't get sick, and saved money!! Also, prior to leaving for my trainings I did a little google searching to find a local track to run on. I was super proud of myself for being so prepared! That was until I got to the track and the school's track team was practicing. So I downloaded one of those fancy gps, running apps on my phone and tracked my miles. I was not defeated! Something that almost defeated me prior to going on my trip, was that my car died on me for about the 7th time :((.. Not that this is ever a convenient, but it is even less convenient when you are a community based social worker that does home visits. Almost every time the car had died on me I was working, twice I was meeting with patients.. So needless to say, a new car was in order, or a more reliable car! Well by the grace of God a car fell into place, and that little situation cleared itself up pretty quickly! I will say that my husband and I are working the Dave Ramsey Financial Peace System (the best we can), and that has really helped keep our spending in perspective. I may not have the most amazing, dream car, but I have a car that runs and is reliable. We may not go out to eat as much as we'd like, or buy all the silly things we want, but we have everything we need and we are living within our means! Besides my student loans my husband and I do not have any debt. It is not always easy, but I have to think it is going to be worth it in the end! Just like anything else in life, there is sacrifice, and dedication until you reach your final goal. Which financially would be to be debt free!! Woohoo!! I highly recommend taking Financial Peace, it has really helped my husband and I remain on the same page regarding finances. We paid off both of our cars in the first few months of our marriage, and have been working to save to put both of us back through school without incurring any more debt!!

On another note, I listen to lots of pod casts. I did realize how much I listen to them until the past few days when I did not have the ability to listen to my IPhone in my car, and had to listen to the radio, and I did not recognize a lot of the songs anymore!! But while I had been listening to my IPhone I was made aware of two points that really stuck out to me:
1.Most people don't know what it feels like to be functioning at their optimal level, because they don't put in the work to get there. 2.Don't be jealous of what someone else has, if you are not willing to put in the same time and effort, and go through the struggles they did to get there.

These are such amazing points to reflect on! I really feel like this can be applied to so many things, on so many levels!

I am currently into week 5 of training for the Detroit Half Marathon, with only 10 weeks to go! I am honestly proud of myself for continuing to stick through it! It is getting harder, but I am some how becoming a faster runner! I am up to 6 miles as my longest run, and am pacing between 10:30 and 11:30 per mile. There have been a couple points while running I have had to reflect, pray, and remind myself what I am doing this for. For all those who can't run, I will run for them! Also time is now becoming a factor. At the beginning of this training, I could run a couple of miles on my lunch break, if I didn't have time after work. Now that I am running 4+ miles on a given day it is not that easy. I am having to make a conscious plan of when and wear I am going to run. This week I have been waking up early in the morning to run before work. With the school year approaching again, I feel like this will remain a necessity if I am going to stick with this. It will all be a very careful balancing act of essential activities. Work, school, run, eat, sleep, repeat... And adding more God time in! I had made that commitment to myself along with the running that I will make more time for God as well! Maybe on the days I don't run, maintaining my early morning scheduled to spend time with God! Ah ha! It will be a Divine balance act... Such as life!

Then Life Happened

So today starts week two of half marathon training has begun. (I just noticed the grammar errors in that first sentence, but I think it is a good example of exactly what Im writing about. I clearly have two sentences going on there.) Last week I can say, that I was really pumped, and confident about doing new things and cutting excuses out of my life. This week I am realizing that I am really going to have to be mindful of over committing myself, and keeping up with life. One thing that was outlined on the training schedule I am choosing to follow is weight training and stretching. I feel like this will be an important factor in me not hurting myself. I have hip pain, and after doing a little research have found I need to work on toning my tushy to support those joints. So today I attended Butts and Guts, at the gym I belong to, and I can say that I definitely need to keep going because those muscles are weak! Also with that being said today turned out to be kind of busy, and I crammed my after work schedule a little too full.  It looked like this, gym, weight watchers, meeting up with a friend, and now its late, I have just enough time to get ready for tomorrow before bed. I did not have time to get my allergy shot, which I normally do on Monday's, and I would not have had time to squeeze my run in, so I got my miles in on my "lunch break." My schedule and all the things I have to do things week are weighing heavy on my mind. I know that I am really going to have to start planning better, and taking a few moments in the day for myself or I am going to fail at this again. Oh and did I mention that I didn't really make anything for dinner, my house is a disaster, and it just occurred to me that my laundry needs to go in the dryer. I have been really having problems with this lately and have had to re-wash clothes multiple times for this reason! But back to failing at this half marathon training... I almost feel like I am more prepared to fail at this, than I am to actually run it. I'm not sure if that is a good thing or not yet. I missed my long run for last week because I was just too exhausted. It was only 3.5 miles, which is 0.5 miles farther than I normally go, so I am hoping it's not too crucial. This weeks long run is 4 miles. I kind of pumped. The thought of running more than 3 miles freaks me out though. I run the same stretch of sidewalk which is 3 miles give or take in any direction that I go. The fact that I will actually have to figure out and plan for that extra mile is going to take a little effort. I am also someone that worries about time, how long things will take, and setting aside enough time to finish. I am thinking that it will need to be something I do in the morning, so that I can get up run my miles and not think about it the rest of the day. I am also having to re-arrange my running schedule and different things because my husband and I are participating in our second mud run this weekend! I am so excited for this! The first one was such a blast. I feel better prepared for this one because I know more of what to expect. My two big concerns are being sore from my long run for the race, or being sore from the race for next weeks miles. I will just have to wait and see.
On another note, I have been having a numbness in my toes again. I had experienced this a few months ago, and after talking with my neurologist, thought it may have something to do with my aspartame consumption. After I cut aspartame out, I hadn't noticed it anymore. Lately every little thing that might be slightly MS related freaks me out. :(.. I am really hoping  that it is my crappy running shoes. I guess I will find out later this week, when I hopefully get some new ones!!
A couple of things are on my mind in my mental part of this process are some things Joyce Meyer had said in her Podcasts last week. The first being at first when you have this great idea everyone is backing you, your adrenaline is flowing and you can't wait to begin. But as the process continues all those people have faded and its just you and Jesus making it work. Secondly, something else from a message I heard from her and I believe is mentioned somewhere else in this blog, about adjusting your life. Everyday is an adjustment, and when one curve ball comes your way, you adjust and try to make everything fit again. This is a mental, and physical journey, and I can not wait to see what happens next! I am sure it will be a whole lot of life!!

Perfect Failures

This morning I was again reminded of the events in my life that could be seen as failures,  and have been great opportunities and learning experiences. I am also reminded of the word picture, "the ripple effect." If what I had wanted to do, had not "failed" I would not have gotten the even greater opportunity that had been waiting for me. A few things that stick out in my mind are, college, the Peace Corp, and re-arranging my wedding. I will start with college, because that seems to be where it all began. I went to college straight out of High School, with no clear career path. I wanted to work with people, "helping them," in some sense of the word. I began taking pre-requisite courses for Physical Therapy, Occupational Therapy, Dietetics, and ultimately graduated with a degree in Social Work. I know I am suppose to have this degree, and here is why. After changing my major a few times, and continuing to struggle with science, and foreign language classes, I contemplated changing schools, and starting over entirely. I met with a few counselors from different schools regarding Nursing programs, to change majors yet again. Changing schools would have ultimately meant completely starting over. I had gone so far with the school I had currently been at that I had enough overall credits to graduate, but did not have enough credits in one area to obtain a degree in anything. So one night, while at work the thought crossed my mind to look through all of the degree programs for the current school I was at and just pick a program that I had the most amount of credits toward. Ultimately that had been Social Work. I only need a couple of classes to apply for the program, so I took them, applied and began the course work soon after. While going through the coursework, I was excited but knew that there was something more for me. I wanted to be a part of something bigger after college, so I applied to the Peace Corps. I went through one interview, and completed all of the necessary paperwork, and patiently waited for everything to be processed. I soon found out that I had not been accepted because they felt my Multiple Sclerosis was too much of a risk factor for me being out of the country for so long. I had the option to appeal, but didn't. I didn't appeal because, soon after receiving the denial, a 20/20 special regarding the Peace Corps aired, and I felt that my denial had happened for a reason, and that it was not what I needed to do at this time. But I was also lost, I didn't have a plan after college other than that. I was going to graduate, join the Peace Corps for two years, and then continue on with my education. But that didn't happen, and I was so unsure of what and where I needed to be. So after graduation, I found a job in my field and tossed around the idea of going to graduate school, and obtaining my Masters in Social Work. I really thought that was what was next. I completed the application, and obtained recommendation letters from supervisors, and professors, and was ultimately accepted into the graduate program. A few months prior to being accepted, my boyfriend asked me to marry him, and my father's health took a turn for the worst. In preparation for school, and to assist in my father's care, I took a more flexible job where I was able to make my own schedule, and hopefully balance everything coming my way. My fiance and I had initially planned to marry a year after our initial engagement, but with my father's health declining, we moved the wedding up. My dad had been sick with Multiple Sclerosis most of my life, and had been unable to attend most of my important moments. High school, and college graduation, dance recitals, band and choir concerts, etc. My wedding was going to be the one thing he was there for, even if it meant moving the wedding up 6 months. So the time line of events went something like this. On a Wednesday I left my job, and had 2 days to finish wedding prep before beginning my new job on Monday. The next day (Thursday), my husband and I finalized, our Hall, Catering, Photographer and the other big details. I also received my acceptance to graduate school that Thursday. Friday my mother in law and I bought decorations, Sunday I went to have my wedding dress altered. Monday I left town to begin training for my new job that was going to last until Thursday of that week. I was scheduled to stay a couple hours from home while completing my training. Thursday morning around 3am my mother called to tell me that she thought my dad had passed, and I was hours away from home. I called my husband, then fiance and asked him to go to my parents until I could get there. My father passed 5 days and 2 months before our wedding, the wedding we had worked so hard just days before to re plan, just so that he could be there. That was one of the craziest times of my life. I wanted to hold myself together so badly because my poor mother was falling apart. I can not even imagine, the man you have been married to for more than 30 years, have had to provide hands on care for, for more than 20 years, is just gone.  I was about to get married, and my poor husband had to see my continually fall apart, and not caring nearly enough about our wedding. We kept our new wedding date, since we had worked so hard to change it once, we did not change it back. I did not go to graduate school that year, and ultimately decided that, that was not where I needed to be either. So as a result of all of my "failures," I was able to experience some pretty amazing things. The Fall after not being accepted to the Peace Corps I had an amazing opportunity to join my church on a short term mission trip to Guatemala. It was such a great chance to connect with people I may have not otherwise been in touch with, to see another country, and experience another culture. This trip will be forever with me. Also that Fall, by now husband proposed. Which if I would have been accepted to the Peace Corps, and been out of the country for two years, may never have happened. As for the craziness surrounding my wedding, and my father's passing I had been very stressed, and saddened that I had taken a new job to help with my dad's care, and to return to school, neither happened. Looking back, taking this job, and being away from home, allowed for my parents to have a few moments alone in the days leading up to my father's passing. The job I took ultimately filled a gap until I found the position I currently have. I am also very grateful that our wedding happened when it did. By moving everything up six months, my husband and I were given time to adjust, and spend some quality time together before my husband returned to school in the Fall. I have ultimately decided against going to graduate school to obtain a Master's in Social Work. I have been lead to begin taking classes toward a Nursing degree. In many ways I feel as though I have come full circle in all of this, and that all of these events needed to happen exactly as they have for me to be at peace with where I am now. Over the course of this week, one message that has become loud and clear to me is that things need to happen in God's timing, and that if I keep God at my center, he will not lead me astray. So although, my life did not exactly go as I had planned, I am sure this is the way God had seen it. I have felt for a long time that I need to reach people through my own story, and personal experiences. It was never clear to me how this was going to happen, but I am seeing that perhaps this blog will be a good way to do that. I can look back and see how other peoples stories, and knowledge of their journey's have helped me manage my own experiences, or have acted as a guide to work through different times in my own life. I am hopeful that my journey will do the same for others, or plant to seed for others to begin seeking God's will, and timing for their own life. I ran across this image today, which goes right along with my perfect failures, so I thought I should share it as well.

Be Inspired

The question that was recently brought to my attention, "What inspires you?"It has really made me think about all the different things that have impacted me, and brought me to where I am today. Another phrase "the ripple effect," really rings true for me on so many levels. There are just days where I am so clearly able to see the vastly different chain of events that has brought me to the exact point of where I am having these thoughts and time of reflection. Let me begin with this. Running. It is something that almost seems trendy these days. Something that everyone is doing, training for and being apart of. Which might frustrate some, but excites me that people are inspired to take part, be active and get moving!! Running had never been something that intrigued me. I am the klutziest, most accident prone person on the planet, my hand/foot to eye coordination is a joke. I have never actively played a sport, I can barely play ping pong. My lack of athleticism goes back to the fact that I participated in Marching Band for four years in high school mainly to get out of gym class, because it counted as a gym credit. (Band actually wore on me, and I secretly loved it, but know one has to know). I became inspired to run after watching a late night TV special/documentary years ago. I can't remember the specific details surrounding the couple featured, but from what I can remember, was that a woman some how became disabled suddenly, by either a disease, or accident. Her dream had been to participate in the Boston marathon, or she and her husband had wanted to complete this race together, and once she became disabled she was no longer able to walk let alone run. Her husband then began running with his wife, while pushing her in a wheelchair. They eventually went on to have a custom chair built, and he ran the Marathon while pushing his wife. I remember him describing the last few miles of this race, and how the terrain was hilly, making it even more difficult to push his wife's chair, but he pushed on and made it to the finish line. From this moment I could not help but think to myself, why are you not running? There are people who can't even walk, and you are an able bodied healthy person, you need to run. It also made me think of my dad. He had been such an athlete, who stayed active, and fit, and ended up being bound to a wheelchair, almost completely paralysed, and unable to do anything for himself because of Multiple Sclerosis. I need to run for him, and all the other people who can't. I set a life goal for myself that I would run a marathon one day. I still have that goal, but having a goal, and working toward achieving a goal are very different things. A few years ago I had begun training for a half marathon. It was the dead of winter in Michigan, I was working and going to school, and training ultimately fell to the way side. I have run some 5k's here and there, but can honestly say I haven't thought about running, or ran in a long time until recently. Recently my husband and I made the decision to be healthier together. Life, and our new marriage greatly impacted our waistlines, and we both needed to get moving!! So we signed up for a couple of mud run 5ks. Our first one was last month, and he kicked my butt! I could not keep up with him, and my bratty self definitely thought it would be the other way around. I kept thinking, I go to the gym, and take boot camp classes, and used to run all the time. Well the key words there are USED TO. I quickly realized I needed to step up my game to make it through the next 5k, and the following 4 miler! I began running again, with those two things being my ultimate goal. The mention of the Detroit half marathon, in October, was brought to my attention soon after. Someone was talking about how there is an international option where you run to Canada over the Ambassador Bridge, and come back to the states through the tunnel. Which sounds pretty cool. I then stumbled upon and article called, "You CAN run a half marathon." The training did not look too hard, week one is 3, 3 mile runs and one 3.5 mile, with a similar schedule the following week, adding additional miles on the long run day. So I made an agreement with myself, that if I could stick with the training plan for one month, I would sign up for the Detroit half marathon. The little voice in the back of my head has not been to confident, considering the fact that I have tried to train, unsuccessfully for a half marathon once before. I am in similar circumstances now, working full time, and beginning school in a few weeks. It may even be a little crazier now that I am married, and have our household to keep up with :/. But, I have made it through the first few runs, and I can say I am sore, and slow! Not much of a confidence boost to say the least. So this leads me back to a conversation I had a few days ago, and the question I was presented with, "What inspires you?" Followed by, "Whats really stopping you from doing this besides the excuses you are making for yourself?"Hmm.. Nothing. Literally, not a thing, besides my own fear of failure. I am afraid of few things. First becoming injured, also running it alone, running over a bridge (which I am deathly afraid of, and hate heights), and not finishing in the allotted time. Mentally I have begun to prepare myself for this, and have vowed to check my excuses at their point of entry, and pay attention to my negative thoughts. Being fearful, reminds me of something my husband recently said, "How often will you have an opportunity to run over the ambassador bridge?" Which also reminds me of another conversation that I had with my dad, regarding applying for the Peace Corps. When he said to me, when will you have another opportunity to do this? It will be a great experience, and you will learn lessons that no one will be able to take away from you. Do this for you, regardless of what anyone else thinks. He also poked fun at my mom and her lack of adventures. I love my mom, to death, but I definitely got my passion to travel, and live outside the box from my dad. I see how much I am like him everyday, and it makes me wish so badly that he could be here. But not just that he was here, that he could be a part of it. So much of my life, my dad was sick, and could not be actively involved. But through everything, he was a fighter. And knowing that I have the same disease, and there is a possibility that  I may be disabled one day, I need to fight, to stop making excuses, and take every oppurtunitty as if it were my last. The reality is, anything can happen at any moment, and I may not be here tomorrow. I need to stop making excuses, and praise God for every day, and every breathe, and every opportunity I have been given. So this one's for you dad, I hope I'm making you proud!  And I will leave you with the questions, What Inspires you?  What is really holding you back from achieving the goals you have set out for yourself?